This post is an anonymous contribution. Respecting the privacy of the writer, I’m ending the introduction here.

Sometimes I wonder if you ever miss me like I do? I miss you.

Everyday and every night. I miss you when I wake up and miss you more when I go to sleep. I see something wonderful; I miss you, and when I see something terrible, I think of telling you. My friends says that I’ll heal over time and once I get over my pain, I won’t even remember you. I so did not want it to be true but then came a time when I so wanted it to be true. But now, you have become a part of me. How can I forget a part of me?

I am tired of missing you but even when I am extremely busy, there you are, at the back of my mind. Your name on the tip of tongue. I miss you when I pass trucks that reminds me of something you said. I miss you when I eat dark chocolate. I miss you when I press my cloths even when pressing cloths has nothing to do with you. I miss you most when I listen to beautiful songs or when its all quiet. I miss you when I see many other couples so happy with each other. I miss you when I see my empty hands, wondering if I ever get to hold your hand and then letting the cruel realities crush my faint hopes. You see, I am scared of wanting you when I know it’s know possible till you want it too and even though I know that you have moved on with your wonderful life, I still miss you. I miss you whenever my phone rang- every time, even when I know that you’ll never call. I miss you till tears sting my eyes and my eyes are stingy all the time.

Anything can remind me of you which is basically everything and so I miss you. I pray hardest, with all my heart for you. When I do not want to pray for you, I find myself not praying at all. I miss you. One day, I’ll move on but till that day:
___________
It was only an ‘opeless fancy.
It passed like an Ipril dye,
But a look an’ a word an’ the dreams they stirred
They ‘ave stolen my ‘eart awye !
They sye that time ‘eals all things,
They sye you can always forget ;
But the smiles an’ the tears acrorss the years
They twist my ‘eart-strings yet !
(George Orwell- 1984)
_____________________

I miss you.

This post is an anonymous contribution. Respecting the privacy of the writer, I’m ending the introduction here.

I forgive you. Really truly I do. I forgive you NOT for your sake but for my sake. I forgive you because you hurt me so deep that it left me fully capable of turning myself into a bitter person for the rest of my life. Someone who is cynical and has issues with trusting anyone. I want to be happy and look forward to a joyous future. Not someone who is forever stuck in past just because of a single person who failed to keep simple promises.

I am not going to let someone else’s cowardliness affect me. I hope you realize that I was not just a mere object of comfort. I was a ‘person’ fully capable of being loved. A person who wants to be cherished, loved and wanted and is not a ping pong ball to be simply thrown away because suddenly it doesn’t seem the ‘right’ one anymore.

Maybe one day you’ll be sorry for your actions, perhaps feel bit guilty as well. Please don’t. Because I won’t be needing your sorrys or guilt or your petty excuses. What I needed, you couldn’t give me. Whatever are your strong valid reasons, they are just petty excuses in my eyes. But just to make myself feel better, I forgive you. I really truly do forgive you.